Here Are Some Things that Make You Just **WONDER**

1) In football, Why do they call it a two minute warning, when it takes at least ten more minutes?

2) Why do they call them apartments when they are so close together?

3) Why do people all try to get along around the holidays, then say Fuck it the rest of the year?

4) If vegtable oil is made out of vegtables and olive oil is made from olives then What is baby oil made from?

5) Why is it that we park on a driveway and drive on a parkway?

6) It never fails to get me, you stop at Mcdonalds or whatever in the morning to get breakfast for yourself and other workers and you order 10 of this and 5 of that and 7 of something else, then get 6 coffees and the person at the counter looks at you with a straight face and says, is this for here or to go?

7) Why do they have to use a sterile needle for lethal injection?

8) Do "Slow children playing" grow up to be "Slow men working"?

9) Why does it seem as all men want to marry a virgin, then turn her into a whore?

10) Whats the differance in regular or virgin, or extra virgin olive oil?

11) Why is it that the toes that you step on on the way up the ladder always seem to be connected to the ass you have to kiss later?

12) When your watch breaks or don't work anymore don't you wonder what or who boke it?

13) You can only wear one pair of shoes at a time,so Why is it women have to have so many pairs of shoes?

14) Why is it that on an interstate that has no stop signs or lights, how that traffic always get hung up when 3:30 or 4:00 comes around?

15) Why do they call it the "100yr war" when it actually was 116yrs.

16) Don't you find it odd that King GeorgeI's actual first name was Albert?

17) Don't you think that the Pillsbury doughboy is just a little too happy for a male with no genitiles?

18) Why didn't Russia discover America? It's only 58 miles across the strait.

19) If Wonderwoman had a invisible jet?????? How did she find it?

20) Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.

21) The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they are okey, then its you.

22) 9 out of 10 times anytime that four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, you can bet that there has just been a bank robbery.

23) You really have to think about how the commercials have gotten to the public lately. Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a preety violent image there. To me I think if you've got a T-shirt with bloodstains all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem. Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash.

24) The 2 most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.

25) If at first you don't succeed, ...skydiving is really not for you......

26) The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was.

27) It is a well known fact that there is nothing known in the universe that travels faster than a bad check.

28) If vegatable markets are for vegatables and fruit markets are for fruit, why do they call them flea markets?

29 When we were growing up and going to school, the last thing we thought of when we were packing a lunch was a handgun.

30) Two wrongs are only the beginning.

31) Expirence is something you don't get until just after you need it.

32) Sucess always occurs in private, while failure in full view.

33) Don't sweat petty things....or pet sweaty things.

34) To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

35) Change is inevitable.....except from vending machines.

36) Eagles may soar, but, weales arn't sucked into jet engines.

37) What is the purpose of the warning lable on a mattress? And what happens if I rip it off?

38) Why do dogs walk around in circles befor lying down?

39) If nothing sticks to "Teflon", then how do they det Teflon to stick to the pan?

39) Why can't we get goose bumps on our faces?

40) Why don't countdown leaders on films go all the way to zero?

41) When a company sells lobster tails to restaurants and stores, what do they do with the rest of the lobster?

42) Why do they need twenty mikes at a press conference?

43) Why is the telephone touch-tone key pad arranged differently from the calculator key pad?

44) What is the differance between "kit" and a "caboddle"?

45) How do graduates find their caps after tossing them in the air upon graduation?

46) Why is it that in any box in assorted chocolates, are the caramels square, the nougats rectangular, the nuts oval, and the creams cicular?

47) What ever happened to pay toilets?

48) Why are hamburger-buns bottoms so thin?

49) Why do ants tend to congregate on sidewalks?

50)Why do American cars now have side-view mirrors on the passenger side with the message, "Objects in the mirror are closer than they appear"?

51) Why do dogs smell funny when they are wet?

52) Why do all denists offices smell the same?

53) Why do ketchup bottles have necks so narrow that a spoon won't fit inside?

54) Ivory Soap advertises its product as 99and 44/100percent pure-- 99and44/100%What? And what is the impure 56/100% of Ivory Soap?

55) Why don't dogs develop larygintis, sore throats, voice changes, or great discomfort after barking continuously?

56) Why doesn't rain come down the chimney into the fireplace when smoke can get out the chimney?

57) What really is the differance between" flotsam" and "jetsam"?

58) Why do doughnuts have holes?

59) Why does newspaper tear smoothly vertically and raggedly horizontally?

60) Washington, D.C. streets are named alphabetically. Why is there no "J" Street?

61)How did Xmas come to stand for Christmas?

62) What happens to the tread that wears off tires?

63) Why do whips make a cracking sound when snapped?

64) Why do bananas, unlike other fruits, grow upward?

65) Why is there a black dot in the middle of otherwise white bird droppings?

66) DO toilet-seat covers really protect us against anything?

67) Why do sailors wear bell-bottom trousers?

68) Why doesn't sugar spoil or get moldy?

69) Why do nurses wear white? Why do surgeons wear blue or green when operating?

70) Why are people immune to their own body odor?

71) Why is one side of Reynolds Wrap aluminun foil shiny and the other side dull?

72) How do three-way light bulbs work? How do the bulbs know at which intensity to shine?

73) Where do they get that organ music in the skating rinks?

74) Why does skin on the extremities wrinkle after a bath? And why only the extremities?

75) What happens to the razor blades that are thrown down used-blade slots in hotels?

76) Why doesn't evorated milk have to be refrigerated?

77) What causes the ringing sound you get in your ears?

78) How did chocolate bunnies for Easter come about?

79) What are the criteria for the placement of a "Dangerous Curve" or "Dangerous Turn" Sign?

Here is the "Perfect Office"?!